


REBOOT REQUIRED

by ReptileRuler



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Established ZaDf, Gen, Neglecting to Install Updates, PAK headcanons, The boys essentially going "TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF OR I KICK YOU IN THE GUTS", ZADF, Zim gets some goddang sleep: the Fic, sleeping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:14:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27839674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReptileRuler/pseuds/ReptileRuler
Summary: To Dib's annoyance, ZIm has been finding joy in forcing him to have a functional sleep schedule. He gets his revenge when he finds out that Zim's has been neglecting to install the latest system updates to his PAK.
Relationships: Dib & Zim (Invader Zim)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 71





	REBOOT REQUIRED

**Author's Note:**

> I just handed in a HUGE school assignment, so today I let myself indulge in writing a fluffy oneshot!
> 
> You can always trust me to write about sleepy boys!

Zim LOVED forcing Dib to sleep. 

He came to his room every night, punched the power switch on his laptop (if Dib didn’t act quickly and save all his stuff, it would get lost forever), and pushed the teen out of his chair and towards the bathroom. The teen was sure it brought him some sort of sadistic joy, using as much violence and force necessary to get him to do his 'disgusting human bedtime ritual’, and then push him into bed and wrap his comforters around him a little too tightly. He’d then stare at him, his eyes glowing faintly in the dark, and yell if Dib dared open his eyes. 

Dib never knew what Zim did once he finally fell asleep, but he would always be gone in the morning. Oh, also, Zim would change his alarm clock so that it always rang exactly eight hours after he’d fallen asleep, so if he didn’t fall asleep fast enough, he’d be late for school! Fun!

Well. Annoying as it was, he couldn’t really complain about having a regular sleeping schedule, could he? The only thing he wanted was some way to get back at him. He couldn’t just push the alien into a puddle or something. That would actually hurt him. No. Dib wished for a way to cause Zim as much unnecessary annoyance and Zim caused him, without doing any real harm. 

“So I told that plookesian to stay out of my ZIM-business, but did she listen? NO!”

Dib sipped his slurp monkey. They were in Zim’s underground parts, and Zim was talking while tinkering on something. His PAK was hooked up to the main computer through a thick cable. That meant something about the level of trust Dib had gained over the past year - he wasn’t concerned about Dib seeing him recharging, or syncing files, or whatever else he did when he connected his PAK like that.

Dib had no idea what the heck he was talking about, though. Pretty much everything in the base was more interesting to look at than hearing Zim’s ramble on plookesian rudeness.

Like the screen behind Zim. Even watching it run system checks on ZIm’s PAK filled him with so much wonder. The PAK was such a mystery to him, it was like nothing else on earth! How did Zim control his spiderlegs? Did he have robot parts in his organic brain too, or was the PAK just connected to his brain via the spine somehow? Did Zim even _have_ a spine?

A weird ding noise filled the room, unnoticed by Zim. Along with it, a pop-up window on the big monitor.

[87 SYSTEM UPDATES AVAILABLE. INSTALL NOW? Y/N]

“Uh, Zim?”

“- And then I- Whuh?” Zim looked up and tilted his antennae towards Dib. His back was still turned away from the monitor, with the pop-up illuminating his form and making his skin actually look more flesh-toned than green. 

“It says you have a ton of updates. Shouldn’t you install them?” He pointed at the monitor. 

Zim’s head whipped around and he made a thinking noise. 

“Later! Zim is busy right now!”

“Isn’t 87 a lot of missed updates? Don’t you need your PAK to, like, work good?” He knew that Zim could only live for about ten minutes without it, but he wondered what would happen to him if the PAK just… stopped… functioning.

He didn’t really want to find out.

“Master has been neglecting his system updates for seven months now”, the Computer’s voice boomed down on them. Zim suddenly got very interested in whatever he was working on. The Computer had, at some point in time that Dib wasn’t sure about, decided to always tell him about all the dumb things Zim did. It didn’t make sense, because Dib would obviously go ahead and stop Zim’s evil schemes the moment he learned about them. Didn’t the Computer want planetary conquest as well?

“Who’s side are you on?!” Zim snapped at the ceiling.

“Seven months? You’ve been going ‘I’ll do it later’ for _seven months_?” Dib asked, horrified. 

Sure, he’d ignored his laptop updates for longer, _but the PAK kept Zim alive._

Said alien shrugged non-committally.

“I’ve been busy”, he said simply. Dib huffed and crossed his arms.

“How busy can you be? You haven’t even tried to take over the world since last Saturday!” Dib accused. He’d been keeping count. ”Just to it now!” They were pretty much just sitting around, anyway.

“No!” 

“Yes! Computer, do it now!” Dib decided to ask his ally in the question rather than the idiot spacebug.

“I can’t initiate this by voice command, buuuuut that monitor with the update window is a touch one.”

Zim gasped as though the Computer had revealed his biggest secret and Dib felt a jolt of excitement. All he had to do was get past Zim and press the ‘Y’!

He made a jump for it, not surprised when Zim tackled him to the ground. Dib aimed a kick at his Squeedlyspooch, but hit nothing as Zim suddenly got yanked away from him.

Zim hung in the air, dangling and suspended by the cable still connected to his PAK. 

“Oh my”, the Computer drawled, “It looks like the data wire suddenly got shorter. How could this be?”

“You traitorous piece of machinery!” Zim shrieked, while Dib wasted no time, “I ought to DISABLE you for good! All you do is snitch my plans to the Dib and-”

Dib reached the screen with the alien still screaming in the background. He pressed the Y. Another question popped up.

[REBOOT REQUIRED. INSTALL UPDATES? Y/N]

Swallowing, he pressed Y again. Behind him a zap of electricity came from the cable connected to Zim, and then detached. Zim’s face met the ground with a thunk. 

“Zim?” Dib asked cautiously. Zim groaned and pushed himself up, glaring at Dib. 

“Stupid earth-monkey”, he spat,” you think you can just go around and-” Zim opened his jaw and… yawned? “-and press buttons like that. Have you _no idea_ what could…”

He stumbled forward, and Dib found himself with an armful of unmoving alien.

“Oh my god. I killed him”, Dib breathed. “I killed Zim! Oh no! Computer?” His voice had risen into a whine, but he didn’t care.

“Oh, no. He’s just rebooting”, the Computer said nonchalantly. Rebooting? He wiggled Zim around until he could get a good look of his face. Zim’s eyes were closed and his lips parted slightly, tongue rolling out of his mouth. He didn’t breathe, but now that he got a closer look, Dib could see his antennae twitching slightly, out of sync. Not dead. Just… sleeping?

“Oh. How long is he gonna ‘reboot’ for?”

“I’unno. Probably a while. There were a lot of updates to install.”

“Okay…”

Dib stood there for a moment longer, wondering what to do with himself. He couldn’t just leave Zim here- everything was made of metal and wires!

“Hey, Computer, Zim doesn’t happen to have like… a bed, or something, somewhere?”

“Nope.”

Okay, that wasn’t helping. Dib huffed, and heaved Zim into his arms in the most undignified way possible. He made his way up the elevator in silence. Funny, Zim wasn’t even that heavy. Even with a huge chunk of metal fused to his back he probably still weighed less than a human of the same size. The paranormal investigator in Dib wondered what kinda stuff Zim’s skeleton was made of. Or even better, how to make strong but lightweight metal like the PAK had. Could he get his hands on some?

They emerged out of the toilet in Zim’s kitchen and he made his way to the couch. GIR and MiniMoose were there, watching cartoons, but the sound seemed muted. He wondered idly if the Computer had turned it off before Dib entered. 

“HELLO!” GIR shrieked when he noticed them. In his arms, Zim’s face scrunched up and he shifted to push his head against Dib’s neck. Freaky.

“Hi, GIR. Um. Your master is sleeping. So I need you to be quiet? Can you do that, please?” He asked.

“Oooooooooh. I don’t know!” GIR said and started giggling. Before Dib could despair, though, MiniMoose squeaked, and GIR gasped and made a zipper motion over his lips. 

Relieved, Dib dumped Zim on the couch. The little alien bounced on the cushions for a moment, but didn’t wake up. He simply rolled onto his side and kept sleeping, back facing Dib. 

Now what? Should he just wait for Zim to wake up? Actually, he would probably just get yelled at for forcing him to install all those updates. 

“He’ll be fine, right?” he mumbled mostly to himself. 

“Yes, thanks to you”, the Computer answered, voice lowered, “I’ve been trying to tell my master to reboot and update his PAK for months, now. He’s been at serious risk of overheating lately.”

“Uh-huh”, Dib said, and thought about how Zim would always break into his house and force him to go to bed, “Say, how often does he have to update his PAK, anyway?”

“There is usually a patch update every earth month or so. It’s not always something important, but it’s better not to delay it for so long.”

Dib nodded. He’d make sure to add a monthly reminder in his calendar, then. For now, he would do exactly what Zim did every night once he fell asleep: Give him the peace and quiet he needed.

He looked under the couch, where he knew Zim kept a basket if GIR’s stuff. After some digging he found a blanket that didn’t look completely disgusting, and draped it over Zim’s sleeping form. MiniMoose had settled down on the couch and been promptly pulled into a hug against Zim’s chest, where he seemed happy to act like Zim’s personal little moose-plushie. 

Dib stood, and realized that Zim looked like a little kid. A horribly deformed, green kid, but still. He was so small, and curled up under a polka-dotted blanket while hugging a plushie, he looked seriously non-threatening. Dib grabbed his phone and snuck a photo. (Not for alien proof, but possibly for blackmailing purposes.)

Then he quietly grabbed GIR’s dog-suit-covered hand and led the robot to the front door. Luckily, GIR seemed happy to spend some time with him, which would ensure that Zim wouldn’t have to wake up to awful robot screaming, at least.

He sent one final look towards the couch, feeling like he’d found a way to get back at Zim.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like this, please tell me your thoughts in the comments <3
> 
> \- I don't necessarily have any solid PAK headcanons. I just grab whatever suits my fics lol  
> \- Zadf is the best when they sometimes still have big battles that might end up in death. But when they're not fighting they make sure the other is taking care of themselves >:)  
> \- I should probably update my own computer before it melts.
> 
> Also say hi to me on tumblr: https://reptile-ruler.tumblr.com/


End file.
